Have your group sex parties but don’t call it a club, Calgary judge rules

Group sex parties can continue to be hosted in a Calgary home but the organizer is not allowed to use club branding for the events, a judge has ruled. 

Matthew Mills began hosting “ethical non-monogamy” sex parties at his house in the northwest community of Silver Springs in 2010 under the name Club Ménage.

The bi-weekly soirées attracted 20 to 50 people on a given night and were advertised online. Club memberships were purchased, and tickets to the events were sold for $30 to cover the associated hospitality costs.

But in 2015, neighbours complained to the city, which ultimately led to Mills being served with a “stop order” in 2019 by the planning and development department.

‘The bedrooms of the nation’

The city found that Club Ménage was a social organization operating on Mills’s property without development authority approval, in breach of municipal Land Use Bylaw.

The Land Use Bylaw prohibits social organizations from setting up shop in residential homes.

Believing he was the target of “moralistic and disproportionate enforcement,” Mills challenged the constitutionality of the bylaw.

Mills’s lawyer Brendan Miller argued his client’s rights to freedom of conscience, peaceful assembly and association were violated by the city’s order. 

“Essentially, [Mills] asserts that land use planning has no place in the bedrooms of the nation,” wrote Court of King’s Bench Justice Nick Devlin, who issued a 29-page ruling last week.

Group sex, swapping partners

Court heard that “ethical non-monogamy” is a “core aspect of [Mills’s] lifestyle,” which he describes as “a philosophy toward sexuality that does not recognize traditional sexual confines of marriage or gender.”

For Mills, “the practice of ethical non-monogamy can involve group sex and the swapping of sexual partners in consensual activity.”

Devlin ruled the bylaw did not infringe on Mills’s rights. The judge found the city is entitled to limit the use of residential homes by social organizations.

“Nothing in the [bylaw] touches directly upon the applicant’s ability to host private parties or allow his guests to engage in ethically non-monogamous activities,” wrote Devlin.

“Rather, it prohibits him from using a single-family home in a residential neighbourhood as a clubhouse.”

Mills ‘pleased’ with ruling

Devlin also found that Mills’s lifestyle choices were not being targeted by the restrictions. 

“It is the genesis and context of the gatherings, and not their size or the nature of their agenda of activities, that is restricted,” reads the judgment. 

Devlin went on to say Calgarians are free to use their homes “for the private hosting of social gatherings, including when these involve gatherings of individuals who share common sexual philosophies, interests and activities.”

“Personal sexual expression, in all its many-splendoured forms, is a fundamental aspect of human life, experience and fulfilment.”

Mills’s lawyer issued a brief statement in reaction to the decision, saying his client will continue to host parties but in compliance with Devlin’s decision. 

“My client is pleased that he can continue to have parties at his house and that the law here has been clarified,” said Miller. 

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